


A Cabin in the Woods

by darkness_prince_dan



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M, Phan AU, Phan Fluff, Phanfiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-04
Updated: 2015-08-04
Packaged: 2018-04-12 23:04:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4498083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkness_prince_dan/pseuds/darkness_prince_dan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan’s running away from his past and gets lost in the woods. Guess who comes to his rescue?</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Cabin in the Woods

“Of fucking course,” Dan says out loud even though there’s no one around.

He’s been trying to get into his car for the past 10 minutes with no luck. He locked himself out and now he’s soaking wet because of the pouring rain which, of fucking course, started when Dan got out of his car. Also, it’s almost midnight and he’s alone on a forest road, apparently lost since he couldn’t find his cabin and he’s been looking for ages. He’s pretty sure he made the right turn at first but now it seems he’s been wondering the forest aimlessly. And, naturally, his car had to give out in the middle of nowhere. Dan’s seen plenty of movies where such a scenario does not end well.

Dan kicks his car frustrated and shivers because it’s cold as shit and it should’ve been a nice August night and he should’ve been at the cabin by now enjoying his solitude. Dan doesn’t know what he wants to do more: laugh, cry or scream. Maybe all three, at the same time.  _Is that even physically possible?_

He takes out his phone. Nothing else to do but call it quits and hope that somebody will find him. Why did he have to rent out a cabin near a town that’s not even on a map? Dan knows the answer but doesn’t want to think about it, instead, he unlocks his screen only to see that there’s no signal. He stares at the non-existent bars and wonders when the killer shows up in this horror movie.

Dan bites his lip and pockets his useless phone. He shivers again, his teeth rattling. The forest is illuminated for a second as a flash of lights crosses the sky, thunder follows soon after.

Dan’s out of ideas of what to do and he’s angry with the man who said he only had to take the first left turn and he’s mad at his car for betraying him and he’s frustrated with himself because what kind of fool gets out of his car to check what’s wrong with it even though he doesn’t know shit about cars and locks himself out of it. How do you even lock yourself out of your car?

“Idiot,” Dan mumbles and kicks the car again. It doesn’t answer.

There are headlights heading his way. Dan considers jumping in front of the car to get the attention of the driver but then he thinks what if the driver is some sort of murderer who searches for his victims on rarely used forest roads. And it would actually be a good plan since none of Dan’s friends or family know where he is and even Dan himself doesn’t really know his whereabouts. So he stays next to his car torn between two possibilities.

However, Dan needn’t have worried his little head because the car stops, headlights blaring into Dan’s eyes so he can’t see anything. There’s a person getting out of the pickup and Dan can almost hear scary music playing in the background. There’s a dramatic lightning flash behind the person and a rumble of thunder. Dan thinks it’s a bit cliché.

The supposed serial killer moves in front of the lights and closer to Dan whose heart is threatening to rip through his ribs and splat in front of the murderer’s feet.

“Need help?” A voice with a slight northern accent asks. He doesn’t sound very murdery but Dan won’t be fooled.

“No, thanks,” he answers internally groaning that he sounds so meek and the rattling teeth don’t help it. “I’m just waiting for a friend,” he lies miserably, even a five year old could come up with something more convincing. Dan blames his fear of darkness and trees for that one.

“Really?” the illuminated man asks. “There’s no one around for miles, it’s raining cats and dogs and you’re just standing here beside your car waiting for a friend?” Dan can’t see the guy but he’s pretty sure the other one is smiling.

 _Maybe he’s also cackling manically in his head ‘cause he found a perfect victim_ , Dan thinks wryly and that’s the only time he used the word ‘perfect’ to describe himself in any situation.

“Yeah, you caught me,” Dan laughs weakly shivering violently from the cold. It’s not like he’s gonna get help soon and maybe, just maybe, this guy isn’t from a horror movie. “My car broke down,” he explains, “and I locked myself out so…”

“Man, that’s bad. I can take a look if you want, I’m a mechanic,” the guy offers and a spark of hope lifts Dan’s spirits.

“That would be great actually,” Dan lets himself smile even though it’s ruined by the rattling of his teeth.

The guy comes closer and now that the headlights are not blaring straight at him Dan can see that he’s got dark hair, already wet and his fringe is plastered to his forehead, a beaky nose and a warm smile. He’s dressed as a stereotypical lumberjack: boots, jeans, and a cotton plaid shirt which is probably appropriate to the setting.  _His lair must be nearby_ , Dan thinks idly as the guy opens the hood of the car and gets his phone out of some pocket to use it as a torch.

“Everything seems fine here,” the guy says moving the light all around the engine. Dan wonders how he can even see when it’s pouring like no tomorrow. “You sure that you didn’t just run out of petrol?” The guy straightens up and looks at Dan with half a smile.

Dan would be blushing right now if the blood in his veins hadn’t frozen. He thought of that himself and he vaguely remembers a blinking light on his dash. But that could’ve been any light, really, his car isn’t one of the newest.

“Could be,” he manages to stammer out as another shiver runs through him. “Thanks anyway,” Dan tries to clench his jaw so his teeth would stop rattling. It doesn’t help.

“You don’t think I’m gonna just leave you here, do you?” The guy asks astonished. “Come with me, I’ll bring you to mine so you can get warm,” he smiles again.

Numerous scenarios run through Dan’s head, none of them involve him staying alive to tell the tale. However, the guy does seem nice and Dan’s freezing his tits off. There’s like a 1% chance he might get locked up and tortured so he’s willing to risk it.

“I’m not gonna kill you in my house,” the guy chuckles as if he read Dan’s thoughts.

“That implies that you’d kill me somewhere else,” Dan mumbles and the guy just laughs again.

“Come on, do I look that dangerous?”

The guy is right, he doesn’t look threatening; he seems to be genuinely worried about Dan. But that might be just because of the rain which doesn’t let Dan have a better look at the stranger. He throws caution to the wind, however.

“Okay, let’s go,” Dan doesn’t even care about not trusting strangers or whatever anymore. This guy is offering warmth and at this point Dan would befriend a cannibal to stop this fucking shivering.

They get into the stranger’s car and Dan can’t stop himself from putting his hands on the air vents blowing so much needed warmth.

“So why are you on a dirt road in the middle of the night?” the guy asks as he glances at Dan.

Dan thinks about lying again but it would probably go as well as last time so he opts for telling the truth, “I rented a cabin here, well, somewhere here, couldn’t find it.”

“A cabin in the woods? Haven’t you seen the movie?” The guy asks smirking and Dan would be lying if he told that he hadn’t thought about that but monsters aren’t real so he shouldn’t be scared. Instead, he should be worried about this kind stranger taking him someplace Dan’s never been. “But for real, you rented Glenn’s cabin?”

“Yeah, you know him?” Dan’s tempted to put his whole face on the air vent but doesn’t dare.

“He’s actually my neighbour. Well, as much of a neighbour as you can be here,” the guy smiles. He seems to be doing that a lot. It unnerves Dan. “If you were looking for it, then you should have taken the first left turn.”

“I did,” Dan almost whines, the guy finds it hilarious because he laughs again.

“No, mate, you took the second left. It leads to my home.” The guy explains as the house comes to view.

The building is modest, to say the least. It appears to have been standing here for decades without anyone taking care of it. It’s, of course, wooden, there’s moss creeping around one corner and a giant wine on the other. There’s also a some sort of shed attached to the shack, its gates are closed. They park in front of the shed and the guy gets out. Dan follows suit and finds himself in a puddle of mud. The kind of a driveway has turned into mush and now Dan’s shoes are completely ruined. This seems to be the best night of his life.

“You coming?” The guy shouts standing under the light hanging above the door. Dan almost loses his shoe trying to get out of the mud but manages to reach the cabin.

Inside it’s not that warm as Dan expected but it’s understandable; who would keep the heat on in summer? Dan glances around while closing the door. He notices a what supposed to have been a dining table to his left, now it’s completely covered in parts of electronic devices, a couple laptops and a proper desktop in the middle. His gaze shifts to the right where the stranger tries to light a fire in the fireplace in front of a ragged sofa and a couple of chairs. Dan’s about to ask something when he hears a bark and he’s knocked to the ground, a wet tongue licking his face.

“Shanu, behave,” the stranger says as he pulls the dog off Dan.

Dan wipes at his face with his wet sleeve as he sits up and stares at the mutt which attacked him. It’s a black dog with one green and one yellow eye. It’s quite huge and wagging his tail staring straight back at Dan.

“Sorry, he’s not usually like that,” the guy smiles apologetically and offers Dan his hand to help him stand up. Dan takes up the offer still watching the dog intently.

“There’s a bathroom at the end of the hall,” the guy says as he lets go of Dan’s icy fingers. “Take a warm shower and I’ll find you some dry clothes. Sound alright?”

“Yeah, sure,” Dan says slowly not turning his gaze away from his attacker.

“He’s not gonna do it again, promise. Right, Shanu?” The guy smiles and pets the dog affectionately. It barks as if it understands what his master is saying.

Dan believes the stranger and heads to the bathroom after finding out where it is exactly. The bathroom resembles the house it’s in; the shower slash bathroom seems to have seen better times than these, it’s rusted around the edges, though the shower head is new. There seems to be mould in a corner of the room and the whole of it is in desperate need of cleaning. Dan ignores all of it even though his inner perfectionist is rebelling. He gets into the shower after peeling off the wet clothes and relishes in the warm water. After a few blissful moments he hears a knock on the door.

“I’ve brought you some clothes,” his host says. “I’ll put them on the counter if you don’t mind.” The last part sounds like a question so Dan gives him permission to enter as he’s hiding behind quite a thick shower curtain so he doubts the stranger will get a peek.

Once Dan’s all warm and dressed in borrowed clothes, he steps out of the bathroom. The dog is waiting for him by the door; its tongue is hanging out of its mouth and it’s wagging its tail. Dan eyes it suspiciously. He slowly extends his hand and gently pets the dog’s head. He’s rewarded with a quiet rumble of satisfaction and a lick of his hand when he pulls it away. Apparently, they’re now friends since the dog stays on Dan’s heels when Dan heads back to the lounge.

The stranger has put the TV on and the air is way warmer than when Dan left; the fireplace seems to be going strong. The guy has also changed his attire though it’s still just jeans and a plaid shirt with what appears to be a motor oil stain or something similar. His feet are propped on a rickety table in front of the sofa and he seems to be completely relaxed. Dan’s glad there are no knives or chains in sight.

“Hope you like  _Great British Bake Off_  ‘cause that’s what we’re watching,” the guy says glancing at Dan and smiling. The dog jumps on the sofa and puts his head on his master’s lap, the guy starts petting him gently without even realizing it.

“I don’t mind it,” Dan says making himself comfortable in one of the chairs.

“Do you want something to eat?” The guy asks all polite and playing the host.

“No, thanks,” Dan fumbles with a sleeve of the borrowed shirt. Now that the guy has appeared to actually not be a serial killer or a cannibal, Dan finds it necessary to apologise for thinking that and to thank him but accepting help has never come easy to Dan, let alone expressing his thanks for it. “I, um, wanted to thank for…” Dan mumbles staring at the sleeve but the guy cuts him off.

“Oh, it’s alright. I couldn’t have just left you there to fend off the wolves, could I?” The guy smiles and Dan’s now worried about wolves roaming the forest and how is he going to get to his cabin on foot if there are fricking wolves? “Don’t look so worried, I was only kidding,” the guy laughs and Dan sighs in relief.

“So…” Dan says after a few minutes of them quietly watching the cooking show not being able to contain his curiosity any longer. “Are you some kind of tech wiz?” He points to the dining table covered in electronics.

“Kind of,” the guy says mysteriously and doesn’t elaborate.

“Can’t be much business in the woods,” Dan remarks.

“There’s enough,” he answers and smiles at Dan. “I also have an auto repair shop in the town so I get by.” He glances down at his dog running his fingers through the fur. “A better question is: what is a city boy like you doing in a town that has lumbering as a primary resource of income?”

Dan lifts an eyebrow. Him? A city boy? How can this guy tell anything after just meeting Dan a half hour ago?

“Oh, it’s written all over you,” the guy says interpreting Dan’s silence correctly. “No guy here wears skinny jeans and studded sneakers, let alone has earrings.”

Dan blushes slightly not even knowing why. He averts his gaze not really wanting to answer the previous question. He doesn’t want to pour his heart out to this stranger because he also happens to be his neighbour and they might even meet again.

“Okay,” the guy says after Dan stays quiet contemplating what lie could be convincing. “What are you running from?” he asks softly as if Dan would have a break down just by hearing the question.

“Why should I be running from something?” Dan bristles undignified. He doesn’t like the implication in that question. As if he’s a coward who tries to avoid his responsibilities or problems. Even though that’s the truth, Dan doesn’t like to be reminded of that.

“Because nobody in their right mind would leave a city to come live here. This place isn’t even on normal maps. Besides there are plenty of people here who have done the same.”

“Are you one of them?” Dan asks; his curiosity is back.

“Are you?” The guy stares at him with those blue eyes and Dan can’t hold his gaze for long so he turns back to the TV.

The rain lets up about an hour later. Though it’s already past midnight, Dan thinks it’s time to take his leave. He’s not sure how he’ll find the cabin or his car when it’s pitch black but he thinks he’s overstayed his welcome and the small talk is becoming quite awkward.

“Um, I think I’m gonna go now but thank you –” Dan says standing up but the guy interrupts him.

“Where are you going?” He asks puzzled.

“Well, I’ll try to find my cabin,” Dan answers confused as well.

“Do you even know in which direction you should go?” The guy asks smiling amused. It only hits Dan now that he doesn’t even know his name. “Stay here for the night. I have a spare room. I believe that’s better than wondering the woods in the dark and falling into some ravine or something.”

Dan’s stunned at the hospitality of the guy. They don’t even know each other and yet he’s been kinder to Dan than any one of his friends.

“Don’t worry, I’ll show you to the cabin tomorrow. It’s only a couple miles from here.”

“That’s not necessary –” Dan tries to say not wanting to burden the guy even more but he’s interrupted again.

“Do you want to wander around or something?” The guy raises his eyebrows. “You don’t know this place, I do, just let me help. Or do you still think I’ll slaughter you?” He smiles.

“Yeah, that theory’s been scrapped,” Dan smiles himself. “Okay, if you’re offering so adamantly, I guess, I could use your help.”

“Could use it? Darling, you desperately need it,” he winks at Dan and Dan can’t help but blush. Are they flirting now or is it just Dan?

“Alright, let’s go to bed,” the guy says standing up and adds laughing at Dan’s expression, “Not together. I don’t take that sort of payment for my hospitality.”

“I didn’t think anything like that,” Dan tries to defend himself but his deepening blush and stuttering suggest otherwise.

“If you say so. Come on, I’ll show you the room.”

The room is in a slightly better state than the bathroom. It has obviously been a teen’s room once; there are posters covering all the walls and even the wardrobe. As Dan glances around he notices a Buffy poster on the ceiling, just above the narrow bed.

“Somebody liked Sarah Michelle Gellar,” Dan remarks smiling.

“Liked?” the stranger asks. “I’d still give anything to be in the same building as she.” He looks at a poster of the afore mentioned star on one of the walls.

“This was your room?” Dan wonders aloud sitting down on the bare mattress.

“Yeah,” the guy bites his lip looking around. His glance lands on Dan. “You need some bedding. Be right back,” he gets out of the room and Dan’s left with the dog.

“Your master sure likes to be all mysterious,” Dan says to the dog reaching out to pet him. The mutt takes that as an invitation to jump on the bed and lay his head in Dan’s lap.

The host comes back a couple minutes later with hands full of sheets and pillows. Dan gets up to help him, the dog whines in disagreement wanting to be petted more.

“Oh, sorry,” the guy says as he bumps into Dan as he couldn’t see him.

“Don’t worry,” Dan answers taking half the things the guy carried over.

The guy shoos the dog away from the bed and they set to the task of making it. They get in each other’s way quite a lot grabbing for the same blanket or pillowcase, brushing hands and bumping into one another in the small space. By the end of it they’re not even saying sorry, they just glance at each other and smile. When the mattress has been flipped to somehow put the sheet on it and all the blankets and pillows have been arranged for ultimate comfort, the guy presents Dan with sleeping attire and bids him a goodnight.

“I’m Dan, in case you were wondering,” Dan says as the guy is about to close the door.

“Goodnight, Dan,” is all he says smiling before shutting the door.

***

Dan wakes up disoriented and staring at Sarah Michelle Gellar. He frowns and sits up. His gaze sweeps the unfamiliar room then he remembers all of last night. He runs his hand through his already curly hair. It’s unusually quiet. Or maybe usually; Dan’s too used to city noises, waking up without blaring sirens doesn’t seem right. However, all that is compensated by the smell of pancakes permeating the air. So Dan gets up and follows his nose.

The guy is humming some song under his breath as he’s flipping a pancake. He’s already dressed and ready for the day. His hair isn’t even curly and the fringe is falling perfectly over his forehead. Dan envies him.

“Morning, sunshine,” the guy says cheerily. “I like your hair.”

 _Such good mood shouldn’t be allowed in the mornings_ , Dan thinks but his sulking quickly vanishes when he sees the plate of pancakes sitting in the middle of the small kitchen table.

“Take a seat,” the guy waves with a spatula to a chair and Dan happily obliges.

They eat chatting about the guy’s obsession with Buffy and how he can’t watch X-files because it scared him as a child. Dan laughs at that but doesn’t admit that he can’t watch any scary movie without the presence of another person.

“So, I thought I’d take some petrol, we’d drive to your car and then I’d lead you to your cabin,” the guy says pouring a copious amount of maple syrup on his pancake.

“Brilliant plan,” Dan mumbles around a bite. “Though there’s a slight problem,” he waves his fork. “I can’t get into my car.”

“Oh, believe me, that’s not a problem,” the guy answers vaguely and Dan supposes that he shouldn’t ask where he learned to pick car locks.

When Dan’s all dressed and ready, the three of them get into the pickup. The dog seemingly insists on sitting near the door so Dan has to try really hard not to sit on the gear shift or the guy’s lap. Dan’s car is still where they left it yesterday. The lock picking doesn’t take very long and the guy says it’s thanks to the old model of the car so Dan thanks his meagre funds as this piece of crap was the only moving vehicle he was able to afford. The guy fills up the car’s tank and Dan gets behind the wheel and follows the other back the way Dan drove yesterday. They reach the cabin fairly quickly. Dan blames the outgrown grass for blocking his view of the pathway because if it weren’t for that, he would’ve easily found the road. It’s clearly none of his own fault.

Glenn’s cabin is in better shape than the guy’s house. The wooden logs show no sign of moss or vines and there’s a pretty porch with a swing.  _A sickeningly dreamy setting for a shitty romantic film,_  Dan muses to himself.

The guy helps Dan to carry all the boxes inside and stashes the groceries Dan bought yesterday into the refrigerator while Dan takes a look around. The interior is all rustic and cosy. There’s a fireplace, comfy sofas and chairs, paintings of flowers on walls and even some taxidermies of forest animals. That creeps Dan out a bit but overall it’s nice, like from one of those design magazines. Nice but impersonal as a rented house should be. Dan thinks he prefers the clutter of the guy’s home.

“Have a nice time unpacking all of that,” the guy smiles at Dan as he motions towards the few boxes. “Shanu, come,” he calls to the dog which already made himself comfortable on one of the sofas.

“Thanks,” Dan says not the least bit looking towards that tediousness.

“How long will you be here?” The guy asks as he pets his dog which is now sat beside him.

“A year,” Dan answers. That should be enough time for everything to blow over.

“Wow,” the guy raises his eyebrows. Dan notices that they’re lighter than his jet black hair.  _Does he dye his hair?_  “You must have made quite a mess if you need to hide for that long.”

Dan’s irritated again. Yes, he’s hiding like a coward but he doesn’t need a reminder, so he snaps back defensively, a natural reaction to him by now, “And how long have you been hiding?” His tone is not exactly friendly but the guy just smiles.

“A couple years,” he answers.

Dan didn’t actually expect an honest answer from him after all the evasiveness yesterday so he’s a bit surprised.

“What from?” Dan asks in a more sociable manner.

“If you’re not telling me, I’m not gonna share my secrets with you.” He’s smiling so Dan doesn’t think he’s offended the other.

“Alright,” Dan says now blushing because of what he’s about to say. His gaze shifts to the floor and he fidgets with his hair nervously. “What do you say if we talk over a drink? I saw a bar in the town; we could meet tomorrow.” Dan glances up all shy. He hasn’t asked anyone out in like a year since all that nonsense started so it took all he’s got to force the words out. But the guy only chews on his lip and Dan gets ready for rejection, his cheeks go even more bright red when he realises that he’s made all the wrong assumptions about the chemistry between them.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” the guy says and Dan has no idea how he’ll face his neighbour after such a humiliation.

“Yeah, I understand, sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking. Like, you’ve been nice to me just because you’re a generally nice person, apparently. I read that all wrong, sorry,” Dan rambles on embarrassed.

“Dan,” the guy stops him smiling. “It’s not like I don’t like you, ‘cause I do. It’s just…” He bites his lip and Dan expects some generic answer along the lines of ‘I’d rather we were just friends’ or ‘I don’t date’ or some other bullshit so he’d feel better.

“One of the reasons I came here is that there are no bars within miles of my place except for the one in town but they know not to sell me anything,” he bites his lip again nervously checking his fringe.

“Oh,” is all Dan can manage to say even though he wants to reassure him that that’s not a problem and he knows people who suffer from that and he’s aware how difficult it is not to relapse and so on but somehow words fail him.

“Yeah,” the guy no longer looks at Dan. “I need to get to work, so I’ll leave you to it,” he says opening the door. The dog runs out of the cabin, the swing squeaks moving slightly from the gust of wind.

“Then maybe you could come here tomorrow?” Dan calls after him. The guy turns back, one hand on the door handle. “I’ll cook something, we’ll celebrate me moving in,” he smiles shyly.

“Yeah, okay,” the guy smiles back at him. “I’ll be here at eight,” the last part sounds like a question so Dan nods his agreement.

The guy turns to go but then he’s back again.

“I’m Phil, in case you were wondering,” the guy grins at him and Dan laughs lightly.

“Bye, Phil,” he says and with one last smirk Phil’s gone.

***

By midnight Dan’s going out of his mind. There’s nothing to fucking do here. The Internet is non-existent, he’s already sick of reading, the unpacking took less time than he imagined and inspiration to write hasn’t come yet. It’s not like Dan hasn’t tried. He sat in front of his laptop for hours trying to write at least a sentence but after the fiasco because of which he came here in the first place he’s been unable to overcome this block. So he sits on the porch swing blaring his favourite songs and mixing in some Taylor Swift because who’s here to make fun of him for that?

He thought of going for a walk earlier in the day but he thought of what Phil said about him most likely getting lost so that idea was quickly scrapped. Then he thought about cooking something fancy for himself to practice for tomorrow but without internet connection he couldn’t find any recipe since he left all his cooking books at his flat. He thought he’s not going to need them because he’s going to be so inspired by new environments that he won’t even have time to do anything else but type. That’s a bust, though, so now he’s swinging unable even to call anyone since his phone’s signal comes and goes as it wishes.

Who’d he call, though, if he could? The majority of his so called friends ignore him and choose to believe the rumours, especially after the trial. His family pity him and if he hears one more pep talk, he’s going to punch someone in the face. There’s no one he’d like to talk to right now. Well, maybe Phil would be a nice distraction but Dan doesn’t have his number and even if he did, he’s not that desperate so as to disturb a person he’s known for a day past midnight.

Dan sighs. Maybe voluntary exile wasn’t such a good idea. Of course, he’d have to face all the nosy reporters back in the city and he’d see the lies they write about him but at least he’d have the Internet. He could also try to contact some publishers since the ones he had a contract with terminated it when the rumours began and publicly announced that they didn’t know anything about what Dan and his co-writer have allegedly done. Well, not so allegedly now since he’s been proven guilty and lost all his earnings from his book. James, however, played the victim and blamed everything on Dan. As if it was Dan’s idea to plagiarise some Chinese man’s book almost word for word on every second chapter. Every chapter that, by the way, was written by James. Though, Dan’s lawyer could not prove that so his name now is associated with fraud of the highest level in the publishing business and James is all safe and sound writing articles for magazines and newspapers. Last time Dan saw him he punched James. That got on a front cover of a tabloid and he was publicly sentenced even before the trial. So, even if Dan could contact any publishers, they’d probably hang up after hearing ‘I’m Dan Howell’.

That’s why Dan ran away, though. He wanted to write without being disturbed by the never-ending hate mail of what an asshole he is and how could he bully poor James into plagiarising another author’s work or tweets consisting of only poop emojis. Some people even got his number and he got quite a few nasty calls and even more text messages with rather innovative curses. Dan doesn’t blame those people, however. The media formed this image of him. James got to them first and told a sob story about Dan forcing him to co-write the book, about how James was in love with Dan and he wanted to please him, how Dan offered sex as some sort of payment for his writing so, of course, James agreed because he’s that fucking stupid and has never really experienced love since his family disowned him when he came out to them and other similar nonsense. Before this interview Dan’s lawyer was quite optimistic but after that it was almost impossible to repair the damage done to Dan’s reputation. And it all went downhill from there for the past seven hellish months.

Dan’s seething now. He shouldn’t have thought of that fucking weasel James. His hands itch with the need to punch something or better yet someone, preferably James. Dan smiles remembering how good it felt when his knuckles connected with James’ nose in front of some fancy restaurant after James gave yet another interview. And how satisfying it was to hear that crack and see him days later on some show telling the same sob story with both black eyes and a broken nose. Of course, the tabloids took off with the story somehow managing to make Dan into an abusive deceitful jerk who apparently only ‘pretended to be gay to entice his co-writer’ since they found Dan’s previous girlfriend. Of course, the notion of bisexuality escaped all of them.

Dan groans and threads his fingers through his hair. Fuck James, fuck the newspapers, fuck the publishers and fuck everybody in general for listening to only one side of the story and believing it without any viable evidence. Dan gets up and goes to run himself a bath to help him relax.

_***_

_Punctual as hell_ , Dan thinks when he hears a knock at exactly eight in the evening.

Phil stands on his porch all cheery and smiley. He’s dressed casually as is Dan. Apparently, they both don’t really know if this is a date or what and how do you choose what to wear when you don’t know if you’re just hanging out with the person or are you courting them?

“Hey,” Phil gets his right hand out of his jeans’ pocket and waves at Dan.

“Hi,” Dan smiles. “Come in.” He moves aside to let Phil in and, Dan’s not going to lie, to admire his ass.

“I made lasagne,” Dan says closing the door. “Hope you’re not vegetarian or something cos if you scrape the minced meat off, it will be just noodles and that’s not what I was going for.”

“Nope,” Phil says turning to him. “I’m all about meat, though, I don’t really like cheese,” he frowns crinkling his nose cutely.

“You weirdo,” Dan laughs. “Who doesn’t like cheese? How do you eat pizza then?”

“I allow cheese on pizza. I just don’t eat it, like, without anything else,” Phil explains rolling his eyes.

“Alright, come on then.” Dan leads him to the lounge area.

The fireplace is not lit, of course, but there are candles that Dan found after a half hour of opening and closing every drawer and closet in the cabin scattered all around. The food is on the coffee table and Dan’s set it up so they could sit on cushions while eating since they’d have to hold their plates or double over if they sat on the sofa. Some classical music is softly playing in the background.

“It’s nice,” Phil says plopping down on a cushion and glancing around smirking.

“Yeah, I just…” Dan doesn’t really know what to say as he’s sitting down in front of Phil. Now he’s thinking that all this might be a bit much and a bit too date like and his face is going red.

“It’s fine, Dan,” Phil says noticing his slight distress and reaching out to run his fingertips on the skin of Dan’s hand.

Dan shivers slightly and the hairs on his arms stand up. He glances up at Phil who retracts his hand and coughs kind of awkwardly.

“I’m starving. Shall we eat?” He says smiling slightly and Dan only nods.

At first they indulge only in small talk but as the evening wears on the conversation turns to more profound topics, for example, who’d kick whose butt at  _Mario Kart_  or which anime is the best and why. Inevitably, though, they come to the matter of their secrets. Dan starts first whilst picking on a grape.

“I always liked writing,” he begins not looking at Phil and concentrating on removing the seeds from the grape. “Not essays or anything like that. Just short stories, something fictional. My best friend, James, also was into that. We would create all kinds of worlds together and fill a couple of notebooks every month or so. After finishing school we went to the same university. I studied English literature, James chose journalism. When we were in our second year, one of my professors got me into a meeting with a publisher. He read my stories and the ones James and I wrote together. He wanted me to sign a contract with him ‘cause he liked them. I said that I’d only sign it with James as my co-writer. He agreed and within the next year we had a book ready to publish. The initial plot was James’ idea, we wrote a chapter each from the points of view of different characters, their plotlines came together only at the end so we could work separately and properly together we wrote only the last couple chapters. After the book was published, we got enormous praise, we went to interviews to talk about it, the sales skyrocketed and we got kind of famous. That lasted for half a year. Then began the rumours that the story’s been plagiarised, the main characters as well. It all spun out of control so fast that one day people were asking me to sign their books and the next my name was dragged through mud. James told every news outlet he could that I made him believe it was an original story, that I somehow seduced him into writing it,” Dan snorts. Everybody who knows Dan knows that he has no charming skills whatsoever. “Then an investigation began and to make a long story short I was the only one tried for copyright infringement. I had to pay back all I got for the sales and then some. Of course, now my name has no credibility and no publisher wants to sign with me. Also, I got thrown out of university in my last year but I meant to quit anyway so that’s not a big loss.”

“And what about James?” Phil asks softly.

“He’s writing articles for some magazine or other. He’s the victim in this story according to the media and I’m the one who punched him in the face in public,” Dan laughs.

“You punched him?” Phil giggles too.

“Yeah, you have no idea how good that was,” Dan beams. “So, now you know why I’m hiding here. What’s your story?” Dan asks leaning back on the couch and popping the now seedless grape into his mouth.

Phil chews on his lip seemingly wondering where to start. Finally, he decides and faces Dan on the couch.

“I grew up in a city up north but I spent every summer here with my grandparents, that’s their house I live in,” Phil stops for a moment. “My grandpa was the one who taught me how to fix cars and other electronics. I was so fascinated with it that I got in to study engineering and programming. My professors said I have a good brain ‘cause it was all kind of easy for me. I got a bit cocky after that and spent less and less time studying and more time partying with all the wrong people. Before long I couldn’t survive a day without alcohol. My grades dropped and I was almost expelled but my grandpa forced me to check into rehab. I was sober for all of three months before I got back together with my ex who got me into all the partying. She had me so wrapped around her finger that I didn’t even care that I was disappointing my family again. After going to a class drunk and telling my professor to ‘fuck himself into oblivion’, I was expelled. That did not go well with my parents and I was no longer welcome at their home. Of course, they no longer gave me money either. And when my savings ran out, my girlfriend threw me out too. My grandpa came to my rescue again and I was back in rehab. While I was there, he died in a car crash. A drunk driver rammed into his car,” Phil stops again and looks away frowning, trying to stop the welling tears. Dan reaches for his hand and twines their fingers together. Phil glances back and smiles sadly. “He left me his house,” Phil continues after a few minutes of silence and of Dan just rubbing circles on his hand, “and his auto repair shop. I permanently moved here a couple years back.”

“I’m sorry,” Dan near whispers biting his lip. He never knew how to console people. His social incompetency is really ruining this moment.

“That got real deep, real fast,” Phil laughs after a couple moments and Dan smiles at him.

After all that gut spilling, they resume the conversation on less emotionally draining topics. At about around 1 a.m. they start to clean up still chatting. Dan admits to kind of like Taylor Swift’s songs and swats at Phil with a towel when he laughs at him for that. Karma catches up with Phil after a couple of minutes when a wet plate slips past his fingers and shatters on the floor into a million pieces. He, of course, starts apologising and blushes furiously. Dan just smiles and says that it’s fine and he hasn’t killed anyone or something and gets a broom to sweep it all up. By the time they’re almost finished with the dishes, Phil’s already cracked another plate and almost sliced Dan’s hand with a knife, so they change jobs. Phil’s still at risk to break something while he dries the utensils with a towel but at least he’s not handing them to Dan and risking cutting him open.

“I really had a good time tonight,” Phil says. It’s past two now and they’re standing on the porch.

“Me too,” Dan smiles. “It’s been a long time since I actually enjoyed somebody’s company,” he admits. “I can’t believe I thought you were a serial murderer.”

Phil laughs at that and Dan’s smile widens. He wonders how Phil can be so genuinely happy after all that’s happened to him. It’s been difficult for Dan to get out of bed for the past half a year and here’s Phil, all cheerful, you wouldn’t even suspect something bad ever happened to him. That gives Dan hope that maybe he’ll be alright too.

“So…” Phil bites his lip, his hands are in his pockets. He looks adorable and Dan really wants to kiss him, though he knows he probably shouldn’t. “I’ll see you later, I guess,” he smiles shyly at Dan.

Dan nods, says a quiet ‘bye’ and watches as Phil turns around to go to his car.

“Phil,” Dan says stopping the other on the porch stairs.

“Yeah?” Phil asks turning around to face him.

 _Screw the societal norms,_  Dan thinks as he strides to Phil, cups his cheeks and kisses him. Phil’s a bit taken aback at first but soon his hands land on Dan’s hips pulling him a bit closer. That proves a bit awkward, however, since Phil’s a couple stairs below Dan’s level so Dan tugs at Phil to step up as Dan steps back making room for him on the porch. Phil’s clumsiness intervenes, though, as he trips over a step and they both fall down on the wooden floor. Phil rolls off Dan laughing and Dan sits up giggling himself.

“That was so smooth,” Dan manages as he laughs uncontrollably.

“That was the best first kiss I’ve had with anyone,” Phil admits through his own fit of giggles.

They soon calm down and Phil helps Dan stand up. Their second kiss goes a lot better. Nobody falls or anything and Dan can actually press flush against Phil. It’s sweet and soft and Dan shivers when Phil pulls away.

“How about you come to mine tomorrow?” Phil asks sweeping Dan’s hair away from his eyes.

“You want me to get lost in the woods?” Dan asks raising his eyebrows.

“Right, I forgot you have no orienteering skills whatsoever,” Phil smiles and Dan rolls his eyes. Dan’s perfectly fine finding his way through a city, it’s got streets and all that. What do woods have? Is he going to ask some squirrel where to find this or that?

Phil spins Dan around so they both face the swings. Dan’s head somehow gets filled with naughty ideas as one of Phil’s hands finds its way to Dan’s hip and Phil puts his chin on Dan’s shoulder.

“See that path?” Phil asks lifting his free hand and pointing at something near the forest line.

“Sure, the yellow brick road,” Dan says nodding. Phil smacks his butt lightly and Dan giggles.

“I’m serious, you idiot,” Phil says but Dan can hear the smile in his voice. “There,” Phil points again, “by that huge rock.”

Well, Dan can see a rock but if there is path, he can’t be sure. It’s all overgrown with weed and Dan missed a whole road when he tried to find this place so he’s not certain he’ll be good at finding paths. But Dan nods assuring Phil he can see the rock.

“Follow that path and you’ll be at my place in like a half hour.”

“A half hour?” Dan asks turning back. “You think I’m able to walk around logs and rocks for that long without hurting myself?”

“I’d suggest you take your car then but we now how that one turned out,” Phil giggles and Dan has to roll his eyes again.

“Alright,” Dan says. “But if I trip over some branch and break my leg, you’re taking care of me as I recover. And I act all whiny and needy when I’m sick or hurt,” Dan warns him.

“You’ll be fine,” Phil pecks his lips quickly and steps back going to his car. Dan’s actually surprised he didn’t trip. “I’m free all day tomorrow, so come whenever.”

“If I survive the journey, you’re so getting your butt kicked at  _Sonic_ ,” Dan leans on the rail of the porch watching as Phil unlocks his car.

“It’s not  _Lord of the Rings_ , Dan,” Phil smiles at him. “And you’re the one who’ll be begging me to stop being so good at  _Sonic_.”

“Oh, it’s on, Lester,” Dan shouts at him as Phil gets in his car and turns on the engine.

***

“Hey there, gorgeous,” Phil says smiling as Dan enters his crappy garage. Shanu follows closely next to Dan since he’s petting the dog while they’re walking.

Phil’s wearing overalls though the upper part is slung around his middle. His shirt is already stained with oil as are his hands. He wipes them on a rag as Dan is coming closer.

“What’s wrong with it this time?” Dan asks looking under the hood of Phil’s pickup.

“Do you really want me to get into a rant about engines?” Phil lifts his eyebrows sceptically.

“Probably not,” Dan allows.

He turns around and Phil’s already beside him. Dan’s been here for a few weeks and he spends most of his time at Phil’s. He watches him programming or fixing some appliance of someone in town that Phil knows (he seems to know everyone). They also play loads of video games, watch tonnes of movies and Dan steals Phil’s Internet when he can since he doesn’t have it at his place (if desperate enough, Dan will go to the library in town but that’s happened only a couple times until Phil find out about Dan’s dire situation). Shanu always seems to be hovering around too. He always walks back with Dan to the cabin no matter if Phil comes along or not. Also, he’s the first to meet Dan when he comes round to Phil’s. Dan thinks he’s got a pretty good thing going on here. And he’s deathly afraid he’ll ruin it. But it’s not even proper autumn yet so he leaves those thoughts locked in the dungeon of his mind to be let out only when he’s alone at night.

And most nights he’s not alone. He spends them at Phil’s writing his new book because he finally got a good idea. Dan likes to think it’s thanks to Phil who inadvertently became his muse. He doesn’t voice it out loud, though, because it’s mushy as hell. Also, Phil is Dan’s proof-reader. He finds all the errors and plot line holes. Of course, only when he’s not busy creating viruses or hacking top secret government facilities. Dan’s learned about Phil’s illegal activities and incomes recently but it doesn’t bother him as much as he thought it would.

Phil leans in being careful not to stain Dan’s clothes and they kiss. It shouldn’t be anything special but Dan’s gotten another rejection letter from a publisher, so he turns Phil’s greeting kiss into something more, not allowing Phil to back away and deepening it as he clings to Phil’s shirt. The other doesn’t oppose that and soon Dan’s sitting on the car’s engine, his legs wrapped around Phil’s waist and he doesn’t care that his clothes are more than likely stained right now.

“It’s not even been a month,” Phil says as he breaks away and pecks Dan’s already raw lips softly. “Your idea for a story is great and somebody will pick it up.” He kisses Dan’s forehead.

Dan thinks that Phil knows him too well. Usually, that would annoy Dan immensely, especially after what happened with James, but he likes finally being able to trust someone and being able to tell them every little detail about himself without being judged.

“I know,” Dan sighs. “But I want it to happen now,” he pouts looking up at Phil who just laughs and tells Dan that he’s adorable. But Dan doesn’t like to be called ‘adorable’, he can deal with ‘cute’, though very grudgingly, so he jumps off the car and leaves Phil to do his fixing or whatever mechanics do (Phil once tried to show Dan what he does while simultaneously telling him about what each little thing under the hood is but Dan got bored and successfully ended the topic by starting to leave hickeys on Phil’s neck).

Phil gets back into the house after a couple of hours. Dan already stole his laptop and is now trying to balance it on his lap. But that proves rather difficult since Shanu decided he doesn’t want to leave Dan’s side today, so with the dog’s head on his thighs it’s quite tricky to also place the laptop there. Dan’s just happy he could shower alone though Shanu growled when Dan tried to get him out of the bathroom. Phil gets a bit envious of that sometimes. The dog used to be all his and now he’s more attached to Dan. Dan would gladly tell the mutt to show his affection to Phil and it’s not like he didn’t try, Shanu just seems to prefer Dan these days.

“You look good in that shirt,” Phil says stepping through the door. “You should wear it more often.”

Dan glances down to the plaid shirt. It’s one of Phil’s since Dan’s now has black fingerprints all over it.

“If I’d listen to you, I’d be dressing in your clothes all the time,” Dan rolls his eyes even though Phil can’t see that because Dan’s staring at the laptop.

“Are you checking your email again?” Phil asks getting closer and resting his forearms on the sofa. “You won’t miss any letters by logging out for two minutes.”

“Hey, don’t touch me,” Dan leans back from him. “I spent an hour scrubbing my skin and trying to get rid of the oil.”

“I wasn’t the one who initiated a make out session on a car,” Phil retaliates.

“Go take a shower,” Dan says smirking. “Then we’ll initiate another one of those sessions.”

Phil smiles and laughs when Dan says, “It was hot, though.”

Dan takes Phil’s advice, however, and logs out of his gmail. It’s been a couple weeks since he sent his story idea and the first chapter for it to some less known publishers abroad. He thought that maybe they won’t have heard about the trial or at least will think about the possibility to have his story published under a pen name since none of the English publishers would even consider that. Dan’s gotten answers from almost all of the publishers, and they’ve all been negative. He’s quickly losing hope of being published ever again but Phil’s keeping his spirits up. Phil’s encouragement is the only thing motivating Dan to write the following chapters; else he’d totally bail on this whole writing idea and start doing crafts or something. That would be interesting, though Dan doubts anybody would buy knitting from a publicly acclaimed fraud.

Dan’s resolve doesn’t last long, however. After six minutes of scrolling through tumblr, he’s logging back into his email. His heart rate picks up as he sees a new letter. At first Dan just skims it picking out the most important elements. His breath catches and he reads it two more times analysing every word and making sure it’s not just a joke. Then he’s jumping up not even caring about Shanu’s protests and running towards the bathroom door laptop in hand.

“Phil,” he screeches as he wrenches the door open.

“Dan, the hell?” Phil asks wide eyed as he peeks around the shower curtain.

“Email, I got it, an email,” Dan jumps up and down beaming and risking slipping on wet tiles and cracking his head open.

“You got an email, we’ve established that,” Phil laughs at him but Dan doesn’t care.

He shoves the laptop into Phil’s face chanting ‘read it’ over and over again. Phil loosens his grip on the shower curtain and clamps his hand over Dan’s mouth.

“Shut up and  _let_  me read it,” Phil rolls his eyes but he’s smiling.

When he’s finished, Phil glances up at Dan.

“See, I told you your idea was great and somebody will want to publish it,” he says grinning. “Can I now finish my shower?”

“Yeah, sure,” Dan cradles the laptop to his chest. “I have to write them back,” with that he dashes out the door not even caring that he left it open.

After a good twenty minutes Dan’s still sitting in front of the computer at Phil’s dining table deleting what he wrote once again. A couple minutes after he received the first letter, another one had arrived. The publishers, based in Australia, want him to come and work with them there. Now Dan’s trying to find a way to politely say that he can’t throw out everything good he has going here and just move across the whole bloody world.

“What’s wrong?” Phil asks as he hugs Dan from behind resting his chin on Dan’s shoulder.

“Why would anything be wrong?” Dan asks a bit too panicky.

“Because you’re biting your lip off,” Phil answers kissing Dan’s temple.

“They want me to come to Australia,” Dan blurts out.

Phil freezes for a couple of seconds and then moves away from Dan to stand leaning against the table.

“Why would they want that?” Phil crosses his hands frowning.

“They want to hear my side of the story with James and to get to know me. It’s a risk for them to publish something I wrote so they want to make sure,” Dan’s biting his lip again.

“They can’t talk to you over the phone? Or can’t you write them the whole story?”

Dan shakes his head.

“They want me there,” he says.

“Then you should go,” Phil shrugs his shoulder.

“You could come too,” Dan smiles hopefully.

“I’m not leaving my life here.”

“Why?” Dan’s suddenly irritated. “It’s not like you can’t hack top notch servers there.”

“And it’s not like you can’t write your book here,” Phil snaps back.

“They want me there,” Dan repeats. “What would you lose if we moved there?”

“We?” Phil raises his eyebrows. “We’ve been together for like a month, Dan.”

“So? I was about to move in with you anyway. That was your idea, by the way.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t mean that we should live together in bloody Australia.” Phil throws his hands in the air frustrated. “Also, have you forgotten why I live here in the first place?” Phil adds angrily.

“Because you’re an addict who can’t fucking control himself near a bottle of beer,” Dan says furious. And then his eyes widen because his brain catches up with his mouth.

Phil clenches his jaw; his hands are balled into fists.

“Get the fuck out of my house,” he sneers at Dan.

“Phil, I didn’t – I wasn’t thinking – ” Dan tries to explain himself but Phil’s not listening.

“I said get out. Or do you want me to throw you out?” His voice is ice cold and Dan’s never seen such pure anger on someone’s face.

Dan stares at Phil in awe for a moment then says a grudging ‘fine’ and leaves.

They don’t speak for two days after that. Phil doesn’t answer Dan’s calls or texts and doesn’t try to contact Dan himself. Dan knows that he fucked up but that’s nothing new. What is new, however, is that he doesn’t want to run away from this but actually tries to find a solution for it.

***

It’s midnight and it’s pouring. Dan’s standing in front of Phil’s door. He’s shivering and rattling his teeth but Phil’s deaf to his knocks. A lightning flashes through the sky, the rumbling of thunder is low and far away. Dan raps at the door, again, Shanu barks, again, Phil opens the door, finally.

“You just want to get pneumonia, don’t you?” He asks stepping aside and letting Dan in.

“I came to apologise,” Dan says through rattling teeth.

“I know, you wrote me an email and texted me,” Phil answers crossing his hands and leaning against the door.

“Phil, I’m serious. What I said was uncalled for and I really didn’t mean it. I’m sorry that I hurt you. I’d say it won’t happen again if you take me back but I can’t promise that. I’ll try, though, not to repeat my mistakes or mistreat you,” Dan says sincerely smiling slightly and hugging himself to stop the shivering.

“Isn’t that from your book?” Phil asks lifting a brow.

Dan blushes fiercely and stutters some nonsense.

“It’s fine, Dan,” Phil laughs suddenly. “I actually wanted to come to you tomorrow to say that we’re good.”

“So why didn’t you let me in?” Dan whines.

“I wanted to see how serious you are about your apology.” Phil smiles innocently and Dan narrows his eyes at him.

“You’re a dick,” Dan mumbles pouting.

“You love me anyway,” Phil says as he goes to hug Dan.

Dan relaxes wrapping his arms around Phil. He closes his eyes and enjoys the warmth. Phil trails his lips up Dan’s neck and Dan shivers, though, not from the cold.

“You’re freezing,” Phil murmurs in his ear.

“Totally your fault,” Dan mumbles back burying his cold forehead into Phil’s neck as the latter flinches. “I made a deal with the publishers,” Dan whispers into Phil’s dampening shirt.

“I hope you didn’t refuse them just because of me,” Phil says slightly alarmed. “We could make long distance work.”

“We won’t have to,” Dan’s eyes are still closed and he breathes Phil in completely content. “I’ll have to go there for a couple of weeks and then I’ll write from here. There will be a lot of  _Skype_ and phone calls but it’ll be fine.”

“That’s the best news I’ve gotten since, like, ever,” Phil kisses his temple.

They stand like that for a few more minutes till Phil’s almost as soaked as Dan. When they both start freezing, Phil ushers Dan to the bathroom to take a warm shower while he makes hot chocolate. Later, as they’re watching some nonsense movie all cuddled up on Phil’s sofa with Shanu by their feet, Dan thinks he really should try fixing his problems more often.


End file.
